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back again

sorry but I had some problems with the blog...but im back again...well...it take a while to realize certain thinks...I dont grove up in a christian family...so before to make the Dts I had no ideea about what or how is a christian life...but in Dts I learned certain thinks that I dont see not even 20% of it out here in the world...so its normal that I got dissapointed with many things and many people and tryed to say that you should do this or that...I was focusing what people doing and what they are not doing and getting angry because of it...but you know? its not that I dont care but everybody have his /her own will...can do with the life what he or she want...from now on I will focuse on what Im doing what it will not be easy while Im living with people...some of you ask me why God dont provide? well...I have the answer...they are so many things that can attract your attencion from God...and the devil is clever...so lately I had not so good relacionship with God and I tryed to do everything by my self...I tryed to be somebody in peoples eyes...and I was so concentrating on this that I almost forgot that there is a God who loves me...I did not go to church more than 5 months...I was close in my box...but God it was with me always...he was there protecting me and loving me...and He is with me now...and it will be always...so Im going to the church today...
ps.I want to ask for forgivenes again from those who get hurt by waht I sad or write or did
God bless you all

forgiveness...

I decidet that I will write her not just the nice thinks...to write all what is happening with me...the forgiveness is our choice...i know there are many people out there from who I ask forgiveness and they cant...why?well is not easy...but is possible...I forgive my step father who destroy my young life... there are many of you who say they loves me and that they are my friends...well I dont see no one of them to ask me if I have something to eat at last...than I dont see how they could be my friends or love me...whatever...Im on my way to close in to my box...its not my fault...maeby some of it...but yes I can live with God peacefully...its more easyer...than to fight...

prayer request

well im still a live...just joking...no work yet but God always provide...anew work...a correct one...like 2 weeks ago I get in contact with somebody from USA who is actually is a director of a foundation from romania named project romanian rescue...I have been living there when I had 15...so he want to make business because the donations are down...so he will sell audio cds with spanish-english language curs...so soon I will have a nice job...please pray that I will God will provide everything I need to resist until I get this job and that He will use me in His way to do the job...God bless you all ps.If anybody need prayer for something just email me or let me know...

easy to talk hard to do...

I think that there is a misunderstanding...I did not say that I want to do it by my self...if you read it again you will see that it says that I will pray that God will lead me to the right people to do His work...people who is not just believe in Jesus but they want to serve him also... The man who says, "I know him," but does not do what he commands is a liar, and the truth is not in him. But if anyone obeys his word, God's love is truly made complete in him. This is how we know we are in him: Whoever claims to live in him must walk as Jesus did.And maybe I don't know much from the Bible but I know what He want from me...and I think many of you know also...but just to know and believe its not enough we must do what He want from us too...and the commandments its not just about don't do this or that its says also about to do this or do that...because brothers and sisters we are focusing more on what to not do than on what to do...I want to ask for forgiveness from all of you who felt that I judge him or her...sometime I'm too direct...may God bless you all

answers...

yes I will update this blog...the other one I created for critics...so when you feel that you want to say something but its not encourageeing or negativ or kind of critizaze than write it there...this blog suppose to be a nice memory...and this way I can also go back and read what I did or what could I do and is usefull in the future...so yes I will update this one the other one its just for critics...Im just trying to separate the negative from the pozitive

important

well I create an other blog when you can express your self freely...does not matter if is positive or negativ...just write there what you feel...the adress is http://criticos4aty.blogspot.com/

the big vision

i know that many of you will say that I'm crazy or who Im to do this but let me say that everything is possible for God...I'm just a tool...many of you know that I get to know Jesus in a very big congregation in Hungary Budapest...you can see this church on youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YNSojYHOpDw well this is my vision:to plant a church and it will became like this...where everybody is welcome no matter of what religion,color,country,social status they have...and they are free to expres them self in any way like they clap they hands they can dance they can scream they can sing with all instruments...no traditions...where the people will be united and help each other in all necesities same spirytual and material...
now I know that you say that this is a dream which many of you I know that you want become truth...so dont give up on your dreams...remember for God is EVERYTHING is POSSIBLE!!!so my brothers and systers please pray that God will give the wisdom,love,peace,pacience and the right people to do His work...God bless you all

conclusion

well I had been thinking and I get a conclusion...let me tell you something...after you make a Dts its not easy to put in practice the thinks that you learned there...everybody just discouraging you push you down and trying to make you believe that you can not do that and that its impossible...the most of the people do that...and if you don't put in practice what you learned than you just trow the money and waste your time...well I did this all my life but it has come to the end...I will never give up on God...I don't care who what say...yes I know that Im crazy nad I dont have that mutch discipline and all that normal stuff what most of the normal people have...but God know me how I am and thats why He choose me to be here where I am...just think about which normal person would be here where I am? in a little room no shower, no kitchen no washing machine and an area of 4`th world...maeby thats why people say that Im taking drogs...here is a lot of drog addicts...there is a saying that you can know a person after what friends he have...and without a work and a support...yes I know that I did some stuff that people dont trust me because of it but Im not perfect...so I dont know who would be that person because until now I dont see nobody just when missionares coming once a while...are people afraid? YES thay are...and those who say that go home they should be thankfull to God that He sent somebody do do His work where people are afraid to go...and Im sure that you ask what Im doing...right now Im trying to survive...and Im not just trying Im doing it...and dont think that Im trying to raise founds...I rarely ask money for my self and when I do I ask just for what I need in the moment...by the way please DONT send money in my account because my VISA ELECTRON is expired...so thats the conclusion what i get...I will never give up on God...

I dont give a skit...:)

well to tell you the truth I dont give a skit what you think about me or what you want from me...the only think what I do care about what God think about me and what He want from me and how important I am in His eyes...but its not always easy...and brother you are not obligated to read the blog...but I suggest you that you should go to make your Dts or if you already in it than open your heart and receive something...may God bless you and give you a new heart...
and thanks to all of you who write in the blog you make me understund many things...may God bless you all

pissed off...

well I dont know who is the m..... f..... who is saying that Im taking drogs...probably someone who is so afraid that his image it will be distroyed...I will not quit from God because He is the only one I have...I just dont want friends who are distroying my life...may God bless you all with all that you bless others...than maeby it will open your eyes...
and just to let you know those who want me to go home I dont have a home...I did not get lucky in this life to have a family a house a car like many of you ok? and in Finland i could have all of this but I give up on them for God...to be here in Mexico and serve Him...if sometime I go down its because of the friends I have...thats why I dont want to have friends who distroying my life...
and no Im not taking drogs...If i drink a beer its my problem and I no think that I have to give explication to anybody...

easy to judge...

I suggest that all of you look in to your self first and than later start to judge somebody else...and if you are christian people like you say than do not judge...and dont say that you love me because you dont even know what is love...you dont even understund it...otherwise I would not have to write this...but whatever...you can go back into your box and dont come out just for judge people...come out to help them...I decided that I will quit from this christianity staff its not like the bible say...its not like in the Dts told us...its a lie everything exept the bible...but everybody so proud about how mutch and how good he knows from the bible but nobody put in practice...

nice friends huh?

well i did not ask money for me...and you dont have to give if you dont want...and I dont want to raise founds...I dont need money what is not from God...and dont say to me to go home...my home is everywhere...and I put any kind of picture anywhere I want...maybe im lost but you are more lost brothers and sisters...whoever write on the blog and dont write his name...are you afraid of something?you should not be afraid if you think that you are doing the right think...but may God bless you all and next time when you write on the blog write your name also if not just dont do it...

a true story

well I will write about a guy whos name is Chimino...he is a kind of lider of the gang...he has been making many mistakes in the past he was in the prison and later they let him out like condicional freedom...when I got to know him he was taking drogs and also his little brother...but than he stopped and also his brother...I never say to him to stop or to judge him because of it but he stop...and I see a big change in him...but 3 months a go he got in the problems again...it was a fight and he was just trying to separate them and it became a bigger fight so they take him to police again and 1 week a go the give him 5 years...well I think that this is not right...he is the one who work for the family and bring food to them...and his brother start to take drogs again...I talked with him and he is very dissapointed of his life that he will lose 5 years of it...the price to take him out from there is 20000 pesos...its a lot of money for us but not for God...so pray and please listen to God and lets show to him and all the people that how mutch God loves them...you can send in my account 313130-3332590 Handelsbanken until 28 april 2009 because after that it will expire my visa electron...may God blees you all

with no job again...

well I dont have a job again...were I worked it was no legal...it was a fraude...however they say it...so now I have to search for an other one...please pray that I will find a right one in rigth time

stil alive...

well I got a job...I had to take a capacity course to got the job and I pass it and I got a special dimploma too...amd it was in spanish...so now im working but it will take a time until I will got money because i have to recruit people to got money...im working human recurses...my spiritualy life its very good...in the last week God talk to me and He want me to plant a church...a free church with no tradicions...I tryed to ignore and say that I cant do this...but I dont have peace...I feel useless if I dont do this...please pray that God will be with me and will provide everything I need to do what He want me to do ...God bless you all

big change...

well...i had to go trough a very difficult time to just dont care about what people say or do...acctualy I care but its not affect me that mutch like before...after Dts it was very hard to do this because we learn there how is right to do things and who is a real christian...now i have to work on:many people contact each other JUST when they need something...they keep in touch JUST when they need something...Im like that also...and I want to ask for forgiveness for all who felt like that with me...because I know that it was like that the most off time...so I have to work on it... and i know that God will help me with it...please pray for me that i will not lose my faith...and that God will provide everything I need to survive and to serve Him...may God bless you all

working...

well I got a job...I dont got so mutch money but ita better than nothing...we make games...for children and for old people...than yesturday I ha an ideea...to make games related to the bible...but I did not know how to say to my boss about...I dont know him very well...and he dont belive in nothing...but I say to him about my ideea...what could I lose? well he say that he will not do that,he is not against any religion or for it, but...If I want to do it I can do it...so Iwas very happy about it...so I have a lot of work...please pray that God will give me enything I need to make this game...it will be a card game...thanks and may God bless you all

back in mexico with God!!!

well I got back here but more different than I go...I come back with God in my heart...in 3 days I understund what it was wrong with me in the last 3-4 months...so I have to start it from zero again...rent a room for me and a room for the club fenix...and continuue Gods work with new powers...not mine but Gods powers...so please pray that everything it will be like He promised...God bless you all

open up...

well the time im here in Guatemala Ywam base I just find out how closed I am...and how far from God...so the time i will spend here at the base it will help me to refresh my mind my spirit and my relationship with God...and to have peace joy and the love of God again more than before...so please pray that all this will be done before I will go where He sending me to serve Him...because without all this all I do it worth nothing...thanx and God bless you all...

again in Guatemala...

its nice to be here again...nice memories...so I will be here a while...I wait for an answer from Casa Shalom...is an orphanage where I will be working If its Gods will...

happy new year...

well I wish a happy new year for all of you...God in this early beggeining of the year have great plans for me...unexpected...well I will go to Guatemala to work in a an orphanage...I will stay at the Ywam base couple of days to raise my faith and make the best connection with God...I dont know if I will have internet there because its a village...but please pray for me for my healt,streinght,passion for christ and what you want more:) for serve God how He want me to serve Him not me or anybody...may God bless you all...

marry christmas

well...for me tradicionaly its not a merry chistamas.........im without everything and anything and anyone...but who care about?donno...I wish you all a merry christmass a better one...

misssing youuuuuuuuuuu.....

well im better a little fizicaly...but...i miss everything and everybody over there...but there is a good news...the youth club what I opened its closed...2 weeks a go... why? thats a good question...they get borred...or they ask them selves why just we have to do all this??????well its closed... not this is the good news...the good news is that I talk with the owner where I was renting before and renovating...and yes...she will rent again!!! the think is that I dont know if Im ready for it...not finnancialy or spiritulaly...whatever...I miss you all...

better..

well the things are going better...my healt is going better at least...i still have a internal brain bleeding...but its going better...it could be very bad...like paralizaze parts of my body...in this case 70% of the people die between 1-30 days...in hospital...I belive that with this accident God wanted to say to me something...and yes He say many things with it...now I understund again how precious its my life...and how many things I can do in it...with God...He come back in my life again...I had been in a very bad,dark,hopeless situation...but God did not live me there alone...so its so great to be again in God`s army...not christian...because its just a tradition...but to be with God always...thanks for those who prayed and help me to get better...just continuu like that and may God bless you ps. I miss you all

welllllllllll.....

I was wondering...its very easy to write bible verses like unswer for the question of life and everything...its very nice and encouraging also some off them but when the bible was writed it was a very different world...and now its a very different world...I know that everything what the bible say is truth...but its easy to say and hard to do it...for my self also and for all human beings...but its possible...everybody say that God will provide and He will do this and that...but like I say we are in a very different world than before it was...God is working with people who created...He is not talking personally anymore...He dont show to people anymore...He is working through people...He is doing everything through people...so if we dont listen to Him and obey what He want us to do than its a little bit not easy for Him to provide...and to do everything what He promised...the bible its not just a book...if you just read it and put in practice exactly how its writen you can be very wrong!without knowing it...but if you analize a little and try to understund than you will see that is not exactly mean the same think that is written...God will give you the wisdom to understund it...if you want...well I dont know how mutch i will still survive here...my left side is going worst and worst...but its ok...may God bless you all...